What Crisis Management Mode Actually Looks Like

Image by Hamed Saber

Um. It's not pretty. (Unlike the lovely picture I've chosen for this post. I think I'm wishing I were there sometimes.)

I've been talking about crisis management mode here and here. And I'm definitely right in the middle of it. My baby isn't even here yet, but it is taking everything I've got just to get through the day. I'm waking many nights not being able to return to sleep. So, I'm very fatigued. Very.

A dear friend told me that perhaps even my last list was a little too ambitious. She told me to focus on "getting dressed and feeding and watering my family". Yes. I think she was right. As I have energy, I'm looking to other things as well, but I really don't have much energy.

So, right now, the house is often littered with random things. We've eaten eggs for dinner more times than I care to count. Laundry is in a little behind and what is clean is still in baskets. My husband is doing lots of dishes, and the meals we've had that weren't eggs, he prepared on the grill. (Bless that man.)

And blogging?

Ha!

That's about all I have to say about that.

To be honest, this has been really hard for me. I felt irresponsible and as though I were letting "someone" down. You know, the hordes of you who are tromping over here every day waiting with bated breath to read what I've written.

But I've come to realize (a bit painfully) that I may need to really step back from blogging even more than I had intentioned to when I anticipated baby coming. I don't plan to stop altogether. I love to write and I love to share what God has been teaching me. But this blog simply doesn't make the cut when it comes to my biggest priorities.

And that's OK.

Wow. What a burden lifted.

I am forever imposing burdens on myself that just don't need to be there. Doing things with a false sense of urgency.

When everything else falls away, there will be so little that really, really, really matters. And I want to focus on, and enjoy, what really matters.

I sincerely hope that those of you who stop by will continue to do so once in a while. Even if it means that there is a serious decline in fresh content. Of course, you could subscribe and then you wouldn't have to keep checking and you'd never miss a single captivating post. Hint, hint. Poke, poke.

But even if some of you move on to greener pastures and never visit again...that's OK. Can you tell I'm talking to myself?

Lord, thank you for the gift of family. For the blessings of children. Thank you for the opportunity of this season of life. Of nurturing, loving and teaching my little ones. May I never miss the "moments" that matter as I'm caught up in something far less important.

The Baby Plan

Image by leezie5

I'm about to have a baby.

I. Am. About. To. Have. A. Baby!

Ahhhhhhh!!

Deep breaths, deep breaths...

OK, in case you can't tell from recent posts, I've been feeling a little overwhelmed of late. I'm fatigued and emotional. I feel awkward and...heavy. My brain has a serious case of fogginess it seems--probably due to fatigue.

I've been trying to take good care of myself by eating relatively well, drinking lots of water, taking my Floradix, etc. But my daily walks have fallen by the wayside and my much, much needed time with the Lord has gotten pretty lax. Sleeping in will do that to you.

So, I'm feeling the need to put a plan--a concrete plan--down on paper. I've had a few plans throughout my pregnancy, but I'm feeling the need to simplify and change it up even more. I want to have a plan for these last few weeks leading up to birth time, and a basic plan in place for afterward as well.

My To-Do List:
Declutter and organize house
Clean, insure and move carseats to Buick (a bigger car to fit all five of us!)
Stock pantry and toiletry cupboards
Redecorating
Get all old pictures organized and made into photobooks
Sell items on Ebay and Amazon
Labor plan for little boys
Organize boys' clothing
Wash baby's diapers and clothes
Paint hallway (This is getting knocked off since Keith says there's just no way we can do this right now. Whew.)
Stock freezer with baked goods and dinner meals
Have garage sale (And this is getting knocked off because I'm seeing the light. Who was I kidding?)
Pack bags for me and for boys
Write series posts ahead of time

My Pre-Baby "Crisis Management" Plan

1. Sticking with the basics every day.
I do need to keep on top of some simple things like my menu plan, making very simple dinners, completing at least one load of laundry a day, a quick tidy, and doing the dishes. I've learned the hard way that letting these items get out of control is disastrous for me. These are my "sinks".

2. Making time with the Lord a priority.
Instead of saying, "Oh, I don't have time for this right now!" I need to say, "I'm so tired and overwhelmed, I must find time to spend with the Lord!" It's really my greatest need right now.

3. Mini-tasking the bigger items on my to-do list.
Some of the things on my to-do list might not get done, but I've got my to-do list tasks spread out and broken down into smaller items if necessary. This way I don't feel so overwhelmed. This approach actually helped me finally get my digital pictures organized and put into photo books. I've had this job sitting on my to-do list since my first son was born. He's four and a half now!

4. Calling in reinforcements.
I just might be calling in some young girls from church who can play with the boys for a day while I finish up some of my cooking and baking.

5. Giving myself grace.
I'm trying to do this, though not always very well. I have a bit of a driven nature, so it's hard for me to allow myself to not be "up to par".

6. Loving my family well.
It's really easy for me to be snappy in my fatigue and discouragement. But the one thing that really matters most right now is for me to love well. For my children to feel secure and loved--even if our house isn't always in the condition I like it to be. For my husband to have a smile in his direction instead of a frown.

My Post-Baby "Crisis Management" Plan

1. Just focus on the basics.
I'm hoping to have lots of food in the pantry and freezer so that I won't have to do very much cooking. But I'll still need to try to do at least a load of laundry every day, keep clean dishes, and do a quick tidy each day. These are things that I know Keith will help me with. (I love you, sweetheart!)

2. Make time with the Lord my biggest priority.
I don't think I've ever taken time to spend with the Lord on a regular basis after the birth of a baby. I was just too tired. But as I just mentioned, when do we need this time most? When we're tired, overwhelmed and discouraged. All things I usually experience after a baby is born. I'd like to be able to say in a couple of months, that even when I did nothing else all day, I found time to rest in the Lord.

3. Call in reinforcements.
My mother-in-law will help me as much as she can, my husband will also do what he can to keep us is in good shape. I may be able to have some young girls come in once in a while to do a quick and basic clean of the house.

4. Doing absolutely nothing that isn't absolutely necessary.
When Caden was born, I got back into the swing of things almost immediately. I thought I felt great! But I crashed soon afterward. I ended up struggling quite a bit with a case of baby blues that lasted longer than it probably should have. When Levi was born, I had learned my lesson. I did my best to follow the above rule, and while I still had some postpartum "downness", it didn't last as long or get as deep as with Caden.

5. Focus on healthy patterns.
Since I'm prone to postpartum depression, I really need to focus on getting adequate sleep, eating nutritious food and getting some activity when it's appropriate.

6. Giving myself grace and loving my family well.
Just as above, it's more important for me to be a source of love and security to my family even if the house is in a bit of chaos for a while. And it's so important to remember that I live under a gracious God! Life will gain a normalcy and pattern once again.

Whew. I feel better having just written down these things that have been floating in my brain. Time to actually put it into practice.

Gratituesday: A Healthy Pregnancy

Image by audreyjm529

I'm officially into my third trimester! Twenty-eight weeks and counting! Woohoo!

Today I'm so thankful for a relatively smooth, easy and healthy pregnancy. I had some fatigue at the beginning, but that quickly passed. I didn't experience morning sickness other than a few queasy moments. I've been able to stay pretty active in spite of a sciatic nerve that wants to act up periodically. I've had great energy until recently when it has tapered off a bit. I think that's due to a typical iron slump I usually experience about this time. (Gotta take that Floradix!)

This little guy is much anticipated. Three boys. Wow. How fun and crazy will that be? Caden likes to talk about what will happen when baby Alec gets here. Levi likes to kiss my tummy--so sweet. Keith is excited to be the daddy of three little men.

This labor and delivery is going to be very different for us. Caden was born in a free-standing birth center--which is almost like having a home birth except it's not at home. I had great midwives and a very free and natural birth with Caden.

Levi was born at home. I had a new midwife, who was incredible, and it was wonderful to be able to have him born right here!

This time around my midwife has joined a doctor's practice and is no longer performing homebirths for the time being. She is able to help women "do birth" in the way that they prefer and has had many, many successful natural and beautiful deliveries in the hospital.

But it's still the hospital. And I've never done that before. It's pretty strange to me to go to the hospital for the first time after giving birth to two babies already. But I have a lot of confidence in my midwife and her ability and desire to advocate for me, so I'm very thankful for that as well.

And a hospital birth means less preparation. And less cleanup (for us, anyway). And someone else to fix food for a while even if it isn't the best food ever. So, that's something else to be thankful for!

I've still got a list as long as my arm of things I'd like to accomplish before this little one makes his arrival, but I'm really, truly enjoying this pregnancy.

Thank you, Lord, for the blessing of this little boy and for such a wonderful pregnancy!

For more thankful thoughts, please visit Heavenly Homemakers.